Monday 17 August 2015

Not ranting for once, i just want to share some really cool experiences I've had XOXO

Hello Ladies, Gentlemen and Non-Binaries, 

I'm a Trans woman, as i'm sure you all know, that means i have the body of a man, no boobs and no Womb. I will be able to grow boobs through the use of hormones but with current medical standings i will never have a womb, it would likely kill me due to transplant rejection, plus no cervix so i can't give birth anyway.

So with that in mind, BEHOLD THE POWER OF THE HUMAN MIND!! My brain has given me what i can only define as 'Phantom Boobs'. Since beginning my transition to a woman i have begun wearing a bra and then using implant things to give my chest shape. I guess through this my brain has been conditioned to associate my chest as having secondary sex characteristics. Even though i can look down and see i have no boobs my brain is having non of it.

Story time!! The other night i was getting ready for bed, i was ready to sleep but i couldn't find a top. I thought to myself, "Eh no biggy, i'll just sleep without a top." So i was settling down but i couldn't sleep. Without a top i felt somewhat exposed. I couldn't shake this feeling that i needed a top. So i went hunting for one downstairs and as i crept downstairs so as not to wake anyone, i found myself instinctively clutching my chest as if to cover my boobs. Once i got the top and was in bed again, i realized that my brain has given me 'Phantom Boobs'!! I think this is one of the most incredible things ever. When i used to live as a man, i had built up all of these mental barriers to shut out any form of femininity. Now that i am openly transitioning my mind has, in a sense, evolved and adapted to become the woman i am. Incredibly my mind has changed itself to match these feelings of femininity!! If you don't think that's incredible then i don't know what is?

On top of my 'Phantom Boobs' I've also been told that i can have mental periods, if you will. Science and psychology have proven that People like me (Male-to-Female Transsexuals) Have the brain chemistry and make up as that of a biological woman. (See the link for wiki article https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_transsexualism) Now through experience and from talking to other Trans Women it seems that we can at times get PMS style symptoms (Boobs get sore, mood swings etc.) Due to the fact that we lack a womb are symptoms do not follow a cycle. In my experience they can come at anytime of the month but they follow the same characteristics of that of a biological woman.
I've been told that this may be due to hormonal imbalances similarly to that of a biological woman. I've also been told that what i'm experiencing may be a form of defense mechanism, as my mind tries to cope with a masculine body that doesn't match my "perceived" gender it will cause cramps and emotional swings while trying to simulate the periods of natal women. Either way it's awesome, i get to have a style of period that eases my dysphoria!!

I wanted to share these experience with you because, from an aspiring psychologists point of view, this stuff is incredibly interesting and i intend to look into this stuff more over the next month.

Anyway, this is your Friendly Neighborhood Transsexual, signing off 
XOXO

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